Let me start this post by saying: Never stay at the Howrd Johnson in Hot Springs! Unless, of course, you enjoy being treated with disrespect by a manager in windpants and flip flops. Then by all means, stay there.
So, my friends and I decided to go to Hot Springs this weekend. We needed a break. We needed to not be in Searcy. If you've ever been to Searcy, then you udnerstand why. We booked some rooms at the HJ, they looked nice online, and there was a deal, so we got two night for $190. We got the confirmation email, 4 adults, 2 nights, $190. Remember those numbers. They are important later.
So Friday, after a wonderful day hiking with the Boy, we loaded up and headed to hot springs. We got there about 9:30 and went in to get our rooms. We were charged $306!! For two hours we talked with the manager. He insisted the rate on our confirmation email was wrong and refused to take the charge off the card. We told him we no longer wanted to stay there and we would pay the cancellation fee and he still refused to take the charge off! Now, I'm sure he thought, 4 young females, we would back down and let him rob us. Well, he picked the wrong females. At one point he asked us if we were lawyers. He turned into a 5 year old. Just telling us no and refusing to do anything. He went back and hid in his little "office" (actually the bar in the hotel). He yelled at us, he told us he couldnt refund us because he didn't have the refund code, his wife did and he couldnt call her (even though he had just been on the phone with her). After two hours, only after we threatened to call the cops, did the guy refund our money and charge us $155 cancellation fee. He still lost money. He should have just given us the origianl rate. But we would have refused to stay anyway. The place was disgusting! Reeked of cigarette smoke and pee. And was completely run down and shady. Plus, we kind of figured dude was going to kill us in our sleep.
I think what burns me the most, is that if a guy had been with us, it wouldn't have gotten as ridiculous and disrespectful as it did. The guy "alan" wouldn't have dared talk to a man the way he talked to us. I guess discrimination and sexism and racism will always be around. To be completely fair, I judged him for the way he was dressed (which I think I'm justified in) and I judged him some for not being able to speak english well. Who knows, maybe he thought we were trying to screw him because he wasn't American. Either way, it was not a pleasant experience.
And we did have the confirmation email.... so..... I'm still thinking he's the bad guy in the situation.
We were proud that we stuck up for ourselves! And celebrated by getting massages and staying in the Peabody the next night, haha. Despite Fridya night, it was a good relaxing weekend, full of friends, laughter and pancakes.
I came home with a cold, but a little bit more self respect as well. And the weekend is proof positive that even if the people around you won't respect you, if you can still respect yourself, everything will be okay in the end.
Never staying in a Howard Johnson, especially the one in Hot Springs, will probably help as well.
Cheers!
Monday, February 18, 2013
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Bitterness
On Sunday, after a long day of work, with little sleep because of the activities of the night before (which I will get to later), I decided to make a pot of tea for a little caffeine boost. I made Prince of Wales, which I hadn't had in years, and kind of forgot what it tasted like. I left the tea to steep in the pot and went to lay down on the couch and watch an episode of the OC. Well, I promptly fell asleep on said couch and never drank the tea. So, this morning, still sleep deprived, and still needing caffiene, and running late and unable to brew coffee, I just reheated the tea and drank it on my way to work.
Now, keep in mind, those tea bags have been "steeping" for two days.
The tea.... was a little bitter..... and I'm still not sure what it's supposed to taste like.
Ah bitterness. That seems to be the struggle lately. I've just been angry at people and elements at work. I've been trying very hard to make healthy and wise decisions, and to be Christ-like in my responses. But I've mainly been reacting, and just can't seem to pull myself out of it. But yesterday, through a wise conversation with my mentor and supervisor, the culprit became clear: bitterness.
If I can start looking at the people/person who has hurt me and betrayed me most, with compassion, and see them for the hurt and broken person they are, see them as Christ sees them, the anger and the bitterness loses it's potency. And that is the only way I can navigate this situation in a healthy and Christ-like way. And more basically, I think it's the only way I can survive.
Saturday night, my pretty awesome boyfriend, took me to the symphony. We both got all dressed up, and I felt like a female! (When you work at an adolescent male rehab with lab puppies, you spend a lot of time in tshirts and jeans). We ate indian food and enjoyed some great music. It was a wonderful night..... until.....
When we got back to his car, we found his window smashed in and his GPS missing. (His cologne was also missing.... but my wallet was still there. Odd.) We spent the rest of the evening talking to cops, vacuuming glass and patching the window with duct tape and a tarp. I didn't get home until 2 and had to be at work at 7:55. Through the whole experience, I was oddly calm. Except for when the cop started talking about the loser crack-head that stole the GPS just to get another score. The way he was talking stripped all worth from the theif. Now, yes, we felt violated, and I would love to see the criminal punished. But to strip him of all his worth? To degrade him like he's less than an animal? That's not right. Many of the guys I have worked with, have been or could have been that criminal.
So, then I wondered, why can I have compassion on this stranger who stole our stuff, but I can't for a person I actually know and have relationship with?
Because it's personal. It feels like betrayal. Which probably means it's even more important that I figure out how to have compassion and forgiveness.
Dang it.
So, lent starts tomorrow. And I am giving up negative talk about my job and the people I have issues with that work there. Instead, for these forty days, I'm going to make a gratitude list of all the things I appreciate about the person/situation.
We all experience bitterness. Sometimes it's on purpose. Certain coffees and teas are supposed to have a bitter element to them. No tea is supposed to be bitter from being left steeping for two days though. I've tasted the bitter of life, of my job. And now I can more adequately appreciate the good, if I can make myself remember where it is. That's life. That's how we navigate it. I wonder how much bitterness we are all hanging on to? The obvious, like the prince of wales tea, or the more subtle, like grudges against co-workers or friends. Bitterness is bitterness. No matter how strong, it still takes away the sweet.
Cheers.
Now, keep in mind, those tea bags have been "steeping" for two days.
The tea.... was a little bitter..... and I'm still not sure what it's supposed to taste like.
Ah bitterness. That seems to be the struggle lately. I've just been angry at people and elements at work. I've been trying very hard to make healthy and wise decisions, and to be Christ-like in my responses. But I've mainly been reacting, and just can't seem to pull myself out of it. But yesterday, through a wise conversation with my mentor and supervisor, the culprit became clear: bitterness.
If I can start looking at the people/person who has hurt me and betrayed me most, with compassion, and see them for the hurt and broken person they are, see them as Christ sees them, the anger and the bitterness loses it's potency. And that is the only way I can navigate this situation in a healthy and Christ-like way. And more basically, I think it's the only way I can survive.
Saturday night, my pretty awesome boyfriend, took me to the symphony. We both got all dressed up, and I felt like a female! (When you work at an adolescent male rehab with lab puppies, you spend a lot of time in tshirts and jeans). We ate indian food and enjoyed some great music. It was a wonderful night..... until.....
When we got back to his car, we found his window smashed in and his GPS missing. (His cologne was also missing.... but my wallet was still there. Odd.) We spent the rest of the evening talking to cops, vacuuming glass and patching the window with duct tape and a tarp. I didn't get home until 2 and had to be at work at 7:55. Through the whole experience, I was oddly calm. Except for when the cop started talking about the loser crack-head that stole the GPS just to get another score. The way he was talking stripped all worth from the theif. Now, yes, we felt violated, and I would love to see the criminal punished. But to strip him of all his worth? To degrade him like he's less than an animal? That's not right. Many of the guys I have worked with, have been or could have been that criminal.
So, then I wondered, why can I have compassion on this stranger who stole our stuff, but I can't for a person I actually know and have relationship with?
Because it's personal. It feels like betrayal. Which probably means it's even more important that I figure out how to have compassion and forgiveness.
Dang it.
So, lent starts tomorrow. And I am giving up negative talk about my job and the people I have issues with that work there. Instead, for these forty days, I'm going to make a gratitude list of all the things I appreciate about the person/situation.
We all experience bitterness. Sometimes it's on purpose. Certain coffees and teas are supposed to have a bitter element to them. No tea is supposed to be bitter from being left steeping for two days though. I've tasted the bitter of life, of my job. And now I can more adequately appreciate the good, if I can make myself remember where it is. That's life. That's how we navigate it. I wonder how much bitterness we are all hanging on to? The obvious, like the prince of wales tea, or the more subtle, like grudges against co-workers or friends. Bitterness is bitterness. No matter how strong, it still takes away the sweet.
Cheers.
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